it's not so much that i'm a cat person, it's that i'm an anti-human person.
who told you those pants looked good?
ignorance may not be bliss, but sometimes it's sure nice.
someone recently told me to get on the bandwagon.
seeing as there was neither a band nor a wagon, i politely declined.
i was also told to get on board.
where is this mystical board people want me to climb on?
in related news, you should not climb on your boss.
waiting for the late night train is like watching an episode of jerry springer.
my horoscope suggested that as a farmer, i should be prepared to fight the corporate invasion.
guess i should get on that?
sometimes it's a matter of making it to the cherry blossoms.
i give myself the benefit of the doubt when there is not benefit to be had.
it's easier to be talked out of something than to be talked into something.
if you have the choice, wear longer shorts.
you don't know how many times i've thought to myself, huh.
if you can embarrass yourself, you probably will.
if there is a curb, i will fall off it.
i have to admit, there is something nice about listening to hit songs played on the organ.
i can’t help but think of a little old church going lady, sitting there, squinting at music for “my humps.”
this week in jenna theatre, jenna is in a long line at a popular clothing store h&m. jenna is minding her own business when a guy from behind her decides to solicit jenna’s opinion.
guy - ohmygod do you like this shirt or does it just look like a giant curtain?
jenna - umm. it's kinda cute..
Guy - but?
jenna - maybe a little curtain like.
Guy - fuck
jenna - i mean it doesn't look like maria von trapp made it or anything...
guy - hmmm i don't know, i don't want people to be all, what is he wearing?
jenna - well, if you like it...
guy - fuck em?
jenna - you got it.
in honor of the guy walking around in a curtain shirt, i invite you all to say, fuck it and wear what you like.
but you can bet your ass i'm gunna have something to say about it.
don't worry, it's not like i know you.