Thursday, July 15, 2010

The Art of Smaller is Smaller

i can't help it, i find people who wear hats fascinating.

i never assume anything is true until after it happens.

and even then, i’m not completely sold.

seeing is not believing, especially if you’re blind.

sometimes the things you most want are the things that you should never touch.

like mc hammer.

or a porcupines.

which begs the question, if mc hammer was blinded by porcupines, could you then be allowed to touch it?

and what is it?

can we finally have an intelligent discussion on what exactly IT is?

i think we should start having morning commute karaoke.

it would make the train ride to work quite interesting.

is it mutual respect or is it mutual annoyance?

they are not mutually exclusive.

it is surprisingly satisfying to call someone a dickhead.

try it next time someone tries to borrow money.

i’m secretly tall.

i prefer vegetables, but i have to keep up appearances.

this week in jenna theatre, jenna has called an oriental restaurant to make a reservation. jenna hates making phone reservations. jenna hates the phone.jenna – hi, i’d like to make a reservation for 4 at 7:45.
lady – ooo, 7:05…i have 7
jenna – nooo…i want 7:45
lady – (mumbling) 7:05…7:05….(to jenna) i can do 7 or 7:30
jenna – not 7:45?
lady – 7:05?
jenna – no, 7:45…
lady – nooo. i have 7.
jenna – not 7:05…7:45…closer to 8
lady – oh i have 4 for 8
jenna – fine, perfect thank you.

you gotta know when to hold ‘em, know when to punch someone.

you can’t always get what you want, but sometimes you get what you need.

like vodka.


Jocelyn said...

hahaha you're right about porcupines, they are so cute! I want one!
7:05!? Good post sister!!

PunkRockRunner said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
PunkRockRunner said...

Um, if porcupines don’t touch then how do you explain baby porcupines?

I don’t care for vegetable. This is why I haven’t visited Uncle Louie since his accident.

You one funny lady (he says as he doffs his hat).


Blackstock said...

Great job tiny!! Absolutely better late than never...worth the wait.

My particular favorites:

"seeing is not believing, especially if you’re blind." HAHA so true!

and your idea of commute karaoke is pure genius! I wonder if there is a way to market that and make money. You'd be rich!!!

Chanthana said...

I'm going to start calling people dickheads -- especially when I'm paying my bills. Great post, Jenna!

Lauren said...

I'm secretly tall too! Good job making reservations. ;)