Wednesday, September 29, 2010

The Art of the Game and the Pain

i would love to go to sleep.

i just don’t know how to get there.

i get lost very easily.

someone should look into updating mapquest or something.

sleep is an elusive bitch sometimes.

elusive elves for christmas.

say that 10 times fast.

actually that’s pretty easy to say 10 times fast.

i would suck as a tongue twister maker upper.

is that a job?

seems like it would be hard to get paid from that nonsense.

can you believe the time?

time is nothing but a number.

age is nothing but wasted time.

time out, it’s all too serious.

seriously, i cannot find sleep.

it appears to be missing.

and i am so tired.

so very tired.

do you ever feel like you’ve been chasing cats on crack?

whenever i hear a police siren i wonder what i did wrong.

i can appreciate how men feel like they need hair, but sometimes men just abuse the privilege.

not pointing fingers, but you know who you are.

this week in jenna theatre, jenna is in her night class while following the game on her computer. (please note - jenna never does this, this is a fake situation, jenna always pays attention in class, dad, always!) a few people in the class are all waiting to hear what happens during the game.
teacher – so if we look at what the behavior of the parent’s results in terms of the child’s response we can see which one is the most effective in the chart…
jenna – (touchdown!) YES! awesome!!!
teacher – excuse me?
jenna – no, i just totally get it now, i was really confused before. the chart helped. it was like it went from zero to 7.
(classmates who know the game was on all clap or nod and vocally agree)

i can only leave with a smile and a whole lot of knowledge.


blackstocks said...


Too clever. Your classmates must love you! I love your lines about sleep...seems like it should be the tagline for the national association of insomniacs.

Jocelyn said...

Wow, now I need a nap. Great job sister!!! :D but seriously, if you find sleep, send it my way

PunkRockRunner said...

I tried saying “elusive elves for Christmas” ten times fast but it ended up being “Elvis Elvis Chrissy” before I made it past number seven. To be clear, I’m referring to Costello and NOT Presley.

This post had managed to confuse me. Are you, or the cats, on crack?

I’ll have you know that most people like my hair. In fact, I will be on the cover of Bird Nest Monthly in June (the one with Rod Stewart on the cover). For the record, I’m quite comfortable with who I are…

Until we tweet again,

Punky (aka the narcoleptics dream)

Lauren said...

Sleep really is an elusive bitch. Sometimes. I love elusive elves! hahaha. Chasing cats on crack! I feel that way many days. Great post. Great wordplay.